Balaam and His Talking Donkey

(Book of Numbers 22:21 - 22:41)
When Balaam rose the following morning, he saddled his donkey and departed with the Moabite delegation.  Angry with him because he was going, Jehovah sent one of his agents to stand in the road and block Balaam's way.  As Balaam rode on, accompanied by two servants, his donkey saw a Jehovan extraterrestrial standing in the middle of the road, brandishing a drawn sword.  The donkey strayed off the road into a field.  Balaam beat it to guide it back onto the road.  The extraterrestrial being then appeared in a vineyard on a narrow path hemmed in by walls on both sides.  When the donkey saw him, it moved close to the wall, with the result that Balaam's foot was crushed against it.  So Balaam beat the donkey again.  The extraterrestrial then appeared appeared farther down the road in a place too narrow for the donkey to pass on either side.  When the donkey saw Jehovah’s man again, it crouched down under its rider.  Balaam lost his temper and beat the donkey with his staff.

Jehovah enabled the donkey to speak, and so it asked Balaam, "What have I done that you should beat me three times?"

"Because you've made me look like an ass!” he retorted.  "If I had a sword, I'd kill you right now."

The donkey declared, "Am I not your donkey, the one you have ridden from the time I became yours until this very day?  Have I ever been in the habit of treating you like this before?”

"Well, no,” Balaam admitted.

Jehovah then allowed Balaam to see his man standing in the road with a drawn sword.  Balaam bowed his head and prostrated himself.  The extraterrestrial spoke to Balaam, "Why have you struck your donkey three times?  I have come to block your way because your trip is contrary to Jehovah's will.  The donkey saw me and turned away from me three times.  If it had not done so, I certainly would have killed you by this time -- killed you, but spared the donkey."

Balaam apologized to the extraterrestrial, "Indeed I have sinned.  I didn't realize you were on the road to block my way.  If you disapprove of my journey, I'll return home right now."

The Jehovan extraterrestrial replied, "No, you may go along with these men, but you must say only what I tell you to say."  And so Balaam resumed his journey with the delegation from Balak. 

When King Balak heard that he was approaching, he rushed to greet him at a Moabite town on the Arnon River, the frontier of his territory.  Balak quizzed Balaam. "Didn't I send you an urgent invitation?  Why didn't you come at once?  Am I not ready to reward you handsomely?"

"Well, I've come to you now -- but keep in mind I do not have leave to say whatever I wish.  I can speak only the words that Jehovah puts in my mouth," Balaam replied.

Balaam accompanied Balak as they went to Kiriath-Huzoth.  Balak sacrificed cattle and sheep and sent some of the beef and mutton to Balaam and the Moabite elders who were with him.  The next morning Balak took Balaam to Bamath-Baal, where he could espy the outskirts of the Israelite encampment.

Notes
1. Jehovah gives Balaam at least a qualified approval to journey to Moab with Balak's delegation, but then sends an agent to stop him on the way.  What can account for this fickleness on Jehovah’s part?  The agent seems to have every intention of killing Balaam, yet we were given the impression that Balaam and Jehovah were on good terms and regularly communicating.

2. The donkey, by avoiding the extraterrestrial on the road ahead, saves Balaam's life.  Balaam beats the donkey thinking it is merely disobedient and not aware that the donkey is acting in his best interests.  How is Balaam to know what's going on?  Is he supposed to read the donkey's mind, since, at this point, the donkey cannot talk?  Yet, Balaam seems to be guilty of some great sin by beating his donkey even though it seemed justified to him.  Is Jehovah, who is always lusting for those animal sacrifices, a closet animal rights advocate?  Does he really care about the well being of the donkey?  --- And, we may ask, what is the point of this story anyway?

3. The extraterrestrial is visible to the donkey, but apparently not visible to Balaam.  Several explanations for this suggest themselves:  1. Balaam does not see the extraterrestrial because he is not paying attention to the road ahead.  2. Balaam is very near-sighted.  3. The extraterrestrial is composed of a different kind of matter which is not always visible or visible only under certain conditions.  4. The extraterrestrial can control minds and make humans and animals see him or not see him according to his will.  5. The extraterrestrial possesses some technical device that allows him to become invisible at will. -- or 6. The whole thing is a fairy tale.

4. Balaam's donkey proves himself a worthy forerunner of filmdom's Francis the Talking Mule and TV's famous Mr. Ed.  It speaks!  Jehovah empowers the donkey to speak human language.  How?  A donkey, even if it were possessed by a more intelligent spirit accustomed to speech, simply does not possess the physical equipment to vocalize much more than "hee-haw."  How does Jehovah manage it?  To paraphrase a line from Inherit the Wind (play and film that presented a fictionalized account of the 1920's Scopes "Monkey Trial"), "If God wishes a donkey to speak, it speaks."  A believer may be satisfied with that, but a logical mind searches for some mechanism by which this miracle could be accomplished.  Does Jehovah throw his voice, or does he make Balaam only think that he is hearing the donkey speak?

5.  The donkey complains to Balaam about his unjustified beating, but doesn't really enlighten him as to the reason for its behavior.  It does dispute with Balaam and wins the argument.  Donkeys are pretty smart, but does Balaam’s donkey manifest human intelligence as well as human vocalization?  Balaam, who is used to communicating with the divine and dabbling in mystical practices, expresses no surprise whatsoever that his donkey has started talking to him.  He does not ask how it has suddenly been endowed with human speech, but threatens to kill his faithful old donkey for its disobedience and for making him look stupid.  (This does seem pretty stupid.  If you own a miraculous novelty like a talking donkey, you don’t kill it, you make money exhibiting it.)  Balaam doesn’t seem to tell anyone that his donkey talks -- this, it seems, not being something prophets customarily brag about.

6. The delegation from Balak that Balaam is traveling with apparently do not see what's going on with Balaam, nor do Balaam's two servants.  They seem to be witness to neither the erratic behavior of the donkey, the appearance of the extraterrestrial, or the phenomenon of the donkey talking.  Where the heck are they?  None seem to be keeping very close tabs on their traveling companion.  Nor does Balaam tell them about his experience.

7. The reader learns a great deal about Balaam's character from the donkey incident.  He seems to be hugely incurious.  He lacks sympathy and understanding, is a harsh, uncaring, and unappreciative master, has a temper and harbors murderous impulses -- all in all, not a great guy.  Jehovah seems to have truck with him, but this is not surprising, since their characters are very similar.